mumsawitch: On September 31st, 2013, Tumblr will start charging you for your account. To avoid this, you MUST get NAKED, stand on your dining room table, and do the macarena, all while singing, “I Will Survive”. After sending the video tape of the previous actions to me, then and only then will David Karp come down your chimney to tell you that your account will stay free. Pass it on, it must be...
The Harry Potter books according to Remus Lupin:
klwhovian: Remus Lupin and that time I was homeless Remus Lupin and that time I was still homeless Remus Lupin and that time I got a job and a place to live Remus Lupin and that time I was homeless again Remus Lupin and that time I kinda had a job and place to live Remus Lupin and that time I was doin shit but nobody saw Remus Lupin and that time I got married, knocked my wife up, left...
people I call "dude."
male friends: dude
female friends: dude
cis friends: dude
queer friends: dude
trans* friends: dude
my parents: dude
my boss: dude
my pets: little dudes
the president: mr. dude
the queen: your dudeness
the pope: holy dude
Until I see a picture of your face, you all look like your icon.
Captain Jack Harkness: hey i just met you
Captain Jack Harkness: and this is crazy bu-
The Doctor: NO.
The Doctor: STOP IT.
Rory has been becoming much more irrational and...
Lire la vidéo
theyellowbrickroad: dont ever ask me if i want anything from mcdonalds bc the answer is always yes
omg Phineas & Ferb is the best shit i’ve ever watched
A dramatic re-enactment of my thoughts while...
me: that's not quite hot enough let me just turn it up to boiling lava.
me: yes good i shall bathe in the waters of mordor.
me: why do we have like 25 different kinds of shampoo?
me: i'ma read the back of this.
me: lather, rinse, repeat?
me: why do i have to repeat is your product so shitty it didn't work the first time?
me: hold the fuck up i have to write fanfic in my head real quick.
me: if water is a renewable resource does that mean every celebrity i've ever loved has showered in this same water before?
me: but you didn't have to cUT ME OFF.
me: did i already wash my hair?
me: i think i did but i don't remember.
me: i'ma do it again.
me: FUCK I REPEATED.
me: well played, pantene pro-v.
me: i wonder what it's like to have sex in the shower.
me: i bet it's awkward.
me: i bet a lot of injuries happen that way.
me: okay time to get out.
me: where the fuck is my towel.
When you have a hater.
Other people: Me:
On the playground in the late ‘70s, while the other kindergartners were tripping...– Tom Hiddleston (via fyeahhiddles)
madgay: i always get nervous when people ask me what my hobbies are i cant exactly say sitting in front of a computer for 8+ hours everyday
BEST COMMENT IN THE RAINBOW OREO PICTURE ON...
gaymerlag: “some of you are going to sh*t yourselves when you open a bag of skittles.”
tiger-festival: Okay listen the most important detail of this matter is being made very unclear Are they actually selling rainbow Oreos now or not
january 2012: this will be my year
june 2012: well fuck this
Mom: Can I see your tumblr?
Me: WHAT TUMBLR?! *throws laptop out window, runs to airport, moves to Mexico, changes name to Pepito*
albrie: wHEN PEOPLE ASK YOU WHAT YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION IS AND THEN JUDGE ME WHEN I SAY IT’S MY MACBOOK WOW SORRY DID YOU WANT ME TO SAY A LOCKET MY GREAT AUNT ALICE’S GRANDFATHER’S SON HANDCRAFTED FROM KING ARTHUR’S SWORD WELDED WITH PHOENIX TEARS AND THE BLOOD OF A WOOD NYMPH NO OKAY I FUCKING LOVE MY MACBOOK NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP AND WATCH HOW I CAN SCROLL WITH TWO FUCKING FINGERS OKAY...